Mother’s Day Lessons
Mother’s day just passed and although it’s a painful time for me because I don’t yet know when we’ll have you in our lives, I would like to take this opportunity to put some things out there and write some notes to you and to me.
I know that when I meet you I’ll be completely over taken and filled by immense love, and that nothing will ever be more important than you in our lives. My biggest aspiration is to be a good example for you, as a person and as a parent. I hope that my love for you doesn’t blind me and that I never put my own insecurities above your needs and best interest.
Nothing would mean more failure as a mom than raising a child to feed a selfish necessity to be needed by him/her. I want you to grow to be independent and I want you to fly away, to see the world. I will encourage you to live wildly and loudly. I just hope that our nest is fun and comforting enough that you will want to return to us frequently and on your own and not because you had to. I’m so happy I have arrived at this conclusion this early.
Our intentions are not to make you feel neglected. You are the most important thing in our lives and we want nothing more for you than your happiness.
But in the mean time, your dad and I will continue to love one another and to cherish our relationship above all, after all, it was our relationship that created you, and it deserves to be celebrated
like a motherfucker. Our marriage will always be first place because that’s the core of our family and you will grow in a loving environment because of it.
Although we love hanging out with you very much, do not feel obligated to hang out with us. I know that after your weird teen phase you’ll mature and you will value your family and will cherish our time together. After all, we’re fun, so why wouldn’t you? Of course we want to spend as much time with you as possible but we understand that you are experiencing the world for the first time and we want you to enjoy it. But please understand that your dad and I are just trying to enjoy the world too and we need to put ourselves first for our sake and yours.
I promise to live my own life and not live through yours. We will share happy moments and I definitely want to be present for all the milestones in your life. But I will not cast my expectations and failed dreams on you. You will have a clean slate to paint your life as you wish.
… to always be there for you, even if it means I need to let you go
… to be open minded, even when your choices don’t exactly agree with what I had dreamed for you
…never say you can’t do something because you’re a girl/boy
… to be supportive of your decisions, even if it means that you might be making a mistake, as long as it’s not a deadly one, in that case I’ll punch you until you snap out of it
… to not be needy and to let you do your thing
if you let me do mine
… to live by example to show you what a great marriage should be like so you have good expectations for when you get married, if you ever do
… to always be by your side, no matter how bad you’ve fucked up
… to always love you, no matter what.
Hope to see you soon!